Lead Me

This is a short video about the song I'm featuring on my other blog today, and it is very honest and raw about what it takes to make your marriage work. It is worth every moment you spend watching it.




The Story Behind "Lead Me" - Sanctus Real from BrightBulb Entertainment on Vimeo.


The lyrics to the song are:

Lead Me by Sanctus Real

I look around and see my wonderful life

Almost perfect from the outside

In picture frames I see my beautiful wife

Always smiling

But on the inside, I can hear her saying

"Lead me with strong hands

Stand up when I can't

Don't leave me hungry for love

Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight

That I'm still the love of your life

I know we call this our home

But I still feel alone."

I see their faces, look in their innocent eyes

They're just children from the outside

I'm working hard, I tell myself they'll be fine

They're independent

But on the inside, I can hear them saying

"Lead me with strong hands

Stand up when I can't

Don't leave me hungry for love

Chasing dreams, what about us?

Show me you're willing to fight

That I'm still the love of your life

I know we call this our home

But I still feel alone."

So Father, give me the strength

To be everything I am called to be

Oh, Father, show me the way

To lead them

Won't you lead me?

To lead them with strong hands

To stand up when they can't

Don't want to leave them hungry for love

Chasing dreams that I could give up

I'll show them I'm willing to fight

And give them the best of my life

So we can call this out home

Lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

Father, lead me, 'cause I can't do this alone

In the video Matt and his wife discuss "Conflict Resolution" and how that has been a difficult thing in their marriage.  It got me to thinking of how important it is to hear that.  You know, when I got married, I had never seen my parents even disagree.  So, when the inevitable arguments came between my husband and I, I found myself feeling very scared and alone.  I didn't know that this was part of growing together.  I thought for sure because we were arguing he was going to leave me.  I was scared a lot.  It took a lot of time, and a lot of arguments, some which were pretty yucky, and him NOT leaving me for me to realize that he really loves me for me, and it's ok to disagree.  It also took wise counsel from my grandmother, who had herself been married over 50 years, telling me that she and my grandfather have been through rough spots and arguments just like the ones my husband and I were having.  She really helped me to let go a little and just be.  Just be married to my husband.  Let go of the fear, let go of the walls, let go of my expectations.

It's important to know who to turn to in your marriage, and it's very important to have friends whom you can trust to defend your marriage in their counsel to you.  If you, for example go to a friend with your problem and that person tells you that your spouse is being ridiculous and you don't deserve to be treated that way, you will begin to believe it yourself and the resentment bug will set in.  If you go to another friend with the same problem and that friend tells you something along the lines of "we have that same problem!  Here are some things we do to make it a little better", in the end you see that conflict is normal, and necessary for growth in your marriage.  Not conflict, but the resolution of conflict will essentially become the glue that binds you and your spouse together.  

Too often people leave their marriage because they feel so alone in the marriage.  If you have friends that you can confide in and trust with your marital quirks it will help to avoid that feeling in your marriage.  It's also important to have *some* things to yourself, some "girl time" or "guy time" where you go out with your own friends, and have a chance to miss each other.  This will help to build the relationships you need to have when you need someone to help you make it through the "for worse" part of your marriage.

There's a reason we say it when we get married.  There is going to be a "for worse" part.  Probably a few.  But the fruit will be worth it!

Before any of this, however, the real glue, the real driving force that will hold your marriage together is God.  You have to have God in your marriage.  It is the only way.  On the Sanctus Real page they have some prayers for your husband, for your children, and for your wife.  Make it a point to pray for your spouse and children regularly.  You'll be surprised at what it does to your marriage and family.